Double Flee A

It's the mornin' and I'm up and at 'em! Got to go to work at the hospital all day so if you break into my house, I won't be here! I recommend the computer if you're looking for something to steal. It's a very entertaining item. Other things to look out for include my letter opener collection, dvd player, and playstation! Don't overlook the kitchen, where I have stored food I intend to eat at some point. If you're not going to take it, you might just want to open the fridge and freezer and unplug it out of spite so my food will spoil. And don't forget to open my three beers and pour them out on the floor, so I can't cool them back off and drink it to cope with your nefariousness. The high ticket items I won't list all of, for breaking in to someone's apartment and looting it should have an element of surprise. I know it's not much, but it's the best I can do. My gift is my song, and this one's for you, burglar.

It's unlikely anyone could extricate my computer from its labyrinth of wiring. After tugging at this one and that, before long they would be insensate with confusion and lucky to find the door.

It's 27 below today with the wind. Yesterday I climbed through the trunk again three times because I am too lazy to buy lock de-icer. J came by and we had dinner, which unfortunately made her stomach unhappy. We jsut discvered this new diet called Atkins, where you eat all the meat you want! It's soo kewl! Dr. Atkins says it's actually the carbohydrates that are what's bad! And he's a doctor!!!

From what appears to be a race-based issue of the onion, this story: Blacks, Whites Put Differences Aside, Work Together To Make Better Burger

When life provides me with a bad dream, it doesn't mess around with one that's a little bad. My bad dreams are really bad dreams. Last night I had a dream that involved animal abuse, bloody children, laughing hipsters, sexual torture, death of all kinds, and gallons of blood splattered everywhere, including, inexplicably, the childrens mouths. It makes me want to take my own advice and not be bothered by this, because all it is is a series of images, a montage clearly intended to produce the effect of my becoming upset, and there's no reason to be when it's only a dream. Next time I see a public execution I'll get a little worked up, but I'll let the dreams go.

posted by dale @ 7:48 AM