Double Flee A

the library

In the library, with its banner-monkey-clicking students watching Lindsey Lohan videos and visiting the KDWB website, I imagine it's a wonder they can keep the computers usable at all. I mean it. I have just seen this happening. I was standing behind the girl on the KDWB website, and couldn't help myself from saying aloud "Number one for today's hit music. K. D. W. B." and smiling sarcastically. She then turned around to see what kind of crazy person could possibly disparage the best radio station, like, ever. At one point I probably would have thought about her "hey, here's a girl without a brain, I bet I could sleep with her with very little difficulty" and been right about it, but since I'm engaged, every girl has become the equivalent of my friend's girlfriend. They're just sort of there, and some of them deserve to be mocked. My friends deserve to dat ebetter than them. Now that I have been freed from the awful chains of random lust, I can see these ditzes for what they are and lay it to rest, when I say about this girl and many, many others: What a retard.

For big fun, I need look no further than google's search field and see what people have been looking for from this computer lately. I'll never forget the time I was at work and the google field said "PEDOPHILE SEEKING HELP", when I was hooked and this little pastime began. Here today, at this computer:

"a christian lost in the classroom"
(This is really, really funny to me. I just love it so much that some poor little Christian has his or her beliefs challenged by actual knowledge and the they go crying for help to the big bad internet. Ha.)
"asian women's discount clothing"
"brian wilson (life story)"
"christians and ethics"
"christian arguments"
(Um, yeah. This one they are going to need some help with.)
"Depeche mode lyrics"
("We are homos." Repeat.)
"How to over come masturbation"
(I am not making this up.)
"Impacts of masturbation"
(Less prostate cancer.)
"My thoughts on Iraq"
"NAFTA"
(Now we're talking.)

I should do this every day.

posted by dale @ 1:13 PM