Saturday

where am I?

It was in the late summer of 2001, when I was working at Nikki's bar and cafe, that I started getting really bored with my routine and started spacing out. I made a hobby of thinking of nothing at all, but it didn't, that I could tell, give me any of the benefits of meditation. I just didn't like to think of anything for a while. I'd just let my mind wander to a place not away from everything, but right in the middle of it, where I'd get lost. That was nice, it was kind of like watching TV with no TV. Nothing would happen, and then time would have passed and the moment I'd been waiting for would arrive. Of course, though, I took it too far and one day as I was riding the bus downtown, I sort of woke up not knowing where I was or why I was there. If this has never happened to you I'd almost recommend it, because it's a very strange feeling. It went just like you'd think it would go.

"I'm downtown on a bus. Why am I on a bus? I'm wearing black. When do I wear black? I'm going north on Hennepin avenue, which is where the place I work is, which is also where I wear black, therefore I must be going to work." Then nothing. Very slowly, I came to; "Am I going to work? Oh, look, a bum. He looks pretty drunk. Always the bums downtown on Sunday. Of course I'm going to work, it's Sunday." or somesuch, but for a minute there was a mental vertigo that was a little scary.

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