Double Flee A

LAURA BUSH BRINGS PEACE TO MIDDLE EAST

JERUSALEM (AP) --

Peace has broken out in the Holy Land following a Sunday statement by First Lady Laura Bush.

In her statement Bush said," We're reminded again of what we all want, what every one of us pray for.What we all want is peace."At which time the crowds of jeering Palestinians grew silent.

"Hey! She's right!" came a shout from the crowd, amd a spontaneous outbreak of peace began.

Israeli soldier Lev Nussimbaum, who had been providing security for the First Lady's trip to the Temple Mount, unloaded the M-16 he had kept aimed at the crowd of protestors and tossed it aside. "Won't be needing that anymore," he said before laying a big kiss on the first Palestinian he saw.

"I am so happy! Thank you Laura! Thank you so much!" said a former Hamas terrorist wiping tears of joy from his eyes as he embraced a Jewish settler.

Ultra Zionist Rabbi Ari Katz and Militant Imam Mahmud Izzat were seen skipping through the streets of Jerusalem arm in arm, cotton candy sticking to their coarse beards. Katz's nickname for Mahmoud is reported to be "Slim", while Mahmoud has been heard calling Katz "Dozer". "I can't tell you how happy we all are," Rabbi Katz said, before a giggling Mahmoud interupted him to say that now he'll have to use all those nails from all those nail bombs to fix his screen door.

Jerusalem's sanitation department was forced to declare Monday "Weapons Disposal Day" as the tons and tons of now useless rifles, grenades, and suicide belts have become piling up in the streets. One bewildered Sanitation worker said "Folks just don't need 'em anymore thanks to Laura."

As she left Bush waved to the crowds of cheering Israelis and Palestinians who held signs reading "Why could't you have come 4,000 years ago?" and "Stay and Be Our Queen". She then said "My work here is done," boarded the plane, and flew back to Crawford, TX.

Thanks for the email Joel.

posted by dale @ 8:55 AM