Double Flee A

I have no willpower

Ok, a couple of days ago I intended to quit this blog, and it looks like I can't.

Something so wonderful happened (besides getting called a faggot by the author of the spoonbender) that I have to announce it.

A while back I took a thirty-six hour bench test, three marathon sessions of highly involved micromechanical whatnot. Condensed into a moment, I can liken that to being kicked in the face by an unhappy man with enormous shoes. I won't have to repeat that wholly unpleasant experience in whole or in part, because I passed. So your pal Dale is now a board certified watchmaker. Hip hip hooray, who's awesome, me. [Bows.]

Some people would be all too glad to see me drift hyperbolically away like a ghost ship into the forgotten mists of time and join the group of people that used to be online, and as long as I can muster the self-discipline not to obsessively post it every time the unelected murder monkey breaks the law, or every time some jackass I work with tells me with this big stupid grin how Methuselah lived to be nine hundred and sixty years old (and I quote: "Really! He did!", and you can tell he fully believes it), I think I'll be ok, if I can just post as infrequently as is necessary. It's not like I have to pay anyone to do this or anything. And in large part, the people who want me gone are the exact ones I'm doing this for.

So I guess I'm rescinding my departure, since I can log on from pretty much anywhere indefinitely for no charge and so on. Sorry if I gave anyone a start. Heck, Jesus died for a few days and he came back too! Really, he did!

Things that would make blogging better for me.
1) If people would stop being idiots so I could focus on other things.
2) A sexy little chess plugin for the sidebar so we could play a game over there.
3) If I was as compelled to say nice things as I am un-nice things. That would put me on par with a motivational speaker, though, and those people are as bad as clergy.
4) If I quit dumping every goddamn link I see.
5) If blogging involved pussy somehow.

What does the future hold for Double Flee A? Not these things.
1) a cross-promotional deal with anyone's myspace page.
2) ugly people doin' it
3) accolades for proper syntax and punctuation.
4) "Where are they now: Coolio"
5) a jew-blamin' hoedown
6) becoming an Alton Brown fanpage
7) more pictures of these two:

posted by dale @ 7:42 AM