try at work

I wonder if network security knows about this.

funny video

what the hell


Is this someone's exhibitionism being passed off as humor?


I made awesome peanut butter cookies and brought them to school today. They were easy to make. Here's the recipe, but I used a cup of actual butter instead of the margarine and shortening. That twerp in my class who's always got a smart-aleck comment and apparently doesn't know the difference between real punk combat boots and skechers combat boots, piped up about how he wasn't having any. I think deep down he might be a nice guy, even one who could have a lot in common with me and whose company I might enjoy, but I'm not dealing with deep down. I'm dealing with the image, including t-shirts that say "sarcasm, just one of the many services I offer". Puh-leeze. Everyone else is enjoying the cookies. They're awesome. I used a couple drops of organic vanilla extract, and the eggs were free range, the brown sugar was light brown c&h, the flour was unbleached, and the butter was organic. They rule.

As long as I was bringing in food, I thought I'd bring in this stuff that's been sitting in my kitchen ever since my friend Chet left it there with the intention of picking up later. (Don't ask. Chet's scattered like that.) The stuff I brought in was laden with trans fats (fifteen or so marathon "energy" bars, six or seven detour "energy" bars, and 3 cans of progresso clam chowder.) I put them on a table under a sign tht said "This stuff is full of trans fats so I'm giving it away. No one should eat trans fat. It's terrible for you. If you don't care, go ahead and take them. -- a health-conscious student". When I came down for lunch, all that was left were the soups. People are too apathetic to figure out that "detour" equals triple bypass surgery.

Someone who was at this computer earlier was at this page, her homepage. Warning, angelfire page. It's pages like this one that make me feel good about my blog.

Tonight I'm taking a pork shoulder and getting it ready for crock-potting. Then tomorrow I'm cooking it all day while I'm at school. Then the next day I'm shredding and chopping it and cooking it all day again, but with barbecue sauce and a pepper or two. Then Wednesday night when I get home from school there will be a steamin' hot crock pot full of barbecue. Or there will be some crazy fire that burns my house down. If you want, come over and have some. But call first or I might shoot you. Nigga.

Back to work on the stem. We're threading but there aren't enough of the threaders to go around so I have to get a good spot in line.

Never mind, my leg has fallen asleep. Way asleep. Yipe, it hurts and tingles. Easy...ow! Easy... yeah, it's pretty dead. Later.

debt, Johnny Cash style

How high's the deficit, momma?
$7, 726,096,627,912.44
and rising.
How high's the deficit, poppa?
She said it's
and rising.
Yeah, it went up that much in the time it took me to write that.
U.S. National Debt Clock

Tom Delay wants to split up the ninth circuit

The guy who thinks the tsunami was purposely directed by god thinks some judges are wacko, but what difference does it make? The man is insane. - Wrap-ups: DeLay puts beef on menu

Anything But Straight:
"Although George W. Bush once owned the Texas Rangers, anyone who has seen him at a press conference knows that his favorite sport is really softball. Bush’s penchant for puff helps to explain the mercurial rise and fall of “reporter” Jim Guckert, who went from working in a cyber-whorehouse to covering the White House as a “correspondent” for conservative Internet mag, Talon News."

The Seattle Times: Opinion: The sorry fiscal record of a "conservative" administration

Bandwidth Theater | Rudolph: The Lost Scene


Good Watertower, EVIL WATERTOWER


Command and Conquer DEN | Picture of the Day

lost america

Lost America Night Photography: "a collection of night photography of the abandoned roadside west"

real or fake

not safe for work

porn history

not safe for work

Calvin and Hobbes, all of them

Calvin and Hobbes

my hero

Grounded: Millionaire John Gilmore stays close to home while making a point about privacy

NYT must-reads

Dowd: W.'s Stiletto Democracy

Brooks: Why Not Here?

Krugman: Kansas on My Mind, the social security slime campaign

Greenhouse: At a Small Shop in Colorado, Wal-Mart Beats a Union Once More

headline stolen from fark: Man, is charged with sexual gratification of a young heifer. Someone needs to switch to decalf


The essay this points to: Boing Boing: Why Wikipedia works, and how the Britannica bully got it wrong
is missing. Bummer, I wanted to read it.


Guardian Unlimited | Special reports | Underwater bike ride to launch students' eight-week crime spree

Free in-flight phonecalls

Free in-flight phonecalls : Lifehacker

There's a saying, stop and smell the roses. Well, here's a lot of boobs to look at.
That's close enough, right?

not safe for work

the reality you want, nsfw

the reality you get

cool bubble chamber photography

Bubble Chamber, Gallery of Collision Events | Processing exhibition, November 2003

associated bubble chamber simulator

Condoleezza Rice's dominatrix outfit

Condoleezza Rice's Commanding Clothes (

starless galaxy?

Scientific American: Starless Galaxy Said Found | Beware the coming propaganda juggernaut | Beware the coming propaganda juggernaut

The public's money is already being spent to sell privatization -- one P.R. firm is being paid $1.8 million by the Social Security Administration.

Where's the outrage, you ask?

where am I?

It was in the late summer of 2001, when I was working at Nikki's bar and cafe, that I started getting really bored with my routine and started spacing out. I made a hobby of thinking of nothing at all, but it didn't, that I could tell, give me any of the benefits of meditation. I just didn't like to think of anything for a while. I'd just let my mind wander to a place not away from everything, but right in the middle of it, where I'd get lost. That was nice, it was kind of like watching TV with no TV. Nothing would happen, and then time would have passed and the moment I'd been waiting for would arrive. Of course, though, I took it too far and one day as I was riding the bus downtown, I sort of woke up not knowing where I was or why I was there. If this has never happened to you I'd almost recommend it, because it's a very strange feeling. It went just like you'd think it would go.

"I'm downtown on a bus. Why am I on a bus? I'm wearing black. When do I wear black? I'm going north on Hennepin avenue, which is where the place I work is, which is also where I wear black, therefore I must be going to work." Then nothing. Very slowly, I came to; "Am I going to work? Oh, look, a bum. He looks pretty drunk. Always the bums downtown on Sunday. Of course I'm going to work, it's Sunday." or somesuch, but for a minute there was a mental vertigo that was a little scary.

lunch break at mefi:

Swallow whatever is in your mouth, or you'll spit it all over the place.

It's Hannidate, where you can find romance the Sean Hannity way. Not a joke. Real. It looks like most of these people have been in relationships that failed. I wonder what could possibly have gone wrong? This is where you can meet great guys like (hold on to your hats, ladies) Mark, who says, "I am a 49 year old truck driver. Divorced, one daughter, 18, looking for a LADY, 45 to 55 years old, no tatoos, no body piercings except ears, but most importantly NOT LIBERAL (lady and not liberal kind of go hand in hand, don't they?)."


Well, I bet there are plenty of liberal ladies' husbands, boyfriends, and fiancees who would like to kick Mark's ass for that idiotic blanket accusation so typical of his subspecies, if he didn't already obviously have so little going for him to begin with. Something tells me Mark had better get used to looking for, not finding, love.

COOL! close to home, an american photo album... visitor submissions

the seventies, art and images from. Looks like it was an awful time to be alive.

family photographs and memories of nazi germany

family history site from BBC

math question?

maybe this chick will answer it.

This should really be called "how to study":
Leading Forward: How to Read and Digest a Book!

star trek cancelled, spontaneous weirdo convention ensues

Yahoo! News - 'Star Trek' Fans Protest Cancellation of Series

another list

100 Best Horror Novels

Their connection to the pentagon is Hollywood's dirty little secret

Pharisee Nation

"I was not at all surprised that George W. Bush was reelected president. As I travel the country speaking out against war, injustice and nuclear weapons, I see many people consciously siding with the culture of war, choosing the path of violence, supporting corporate greed, rampant militarism, and global domination. I see many others swept up in the raging current of patriotism. Since most of these people, beginning with the president, claim to be Christian, I am ashamed and appalled that they support war and systemic injustice, that they do it in the name of God, and that they feign fidelity to the nonviolent Jesus who gave his life resisting institutionalized injustice...

I used to think these all-American Christians never read the Gospel, that they simply chose not to be authentic disciples of the nonviolent Jesus. Now, alas, I think they have indeed chosen discipleship, but not to the hero of the Gospels, Jesus. Instead, through their actions, they have become disciples of the devout, religious, all-powerful, murderous Pharisees who killed him."

Friday - Total Immersion Technology Seeking Vice President, CMT DUKES OF HAZZARD INSTITUTE

the application

an easy $100,000?

I want to believe.
LinkedIn: Vice President, CMT Dukes of Hazzard Institute at CMT Dukes of Hazzard Institute

want to steal a car?

ron jeremy

a man of many talents.
not safe for work

Misconceptions about the Big Bang

Science & Technology at Scientific Misconceptions about the Big Bang -- [ COSMOLOGY ] -- Baffled by the expansion of the universe? You're not alone.

print at work

Bill Moyers: There Is No Tomorrow

Watch Live Broadband TV Broadcasts on the internet

Psycho Studio - Edit your own Shower Scene!

This article, which ruined my illusion that it would all work itself out politically someday, made it to metafilter. Finally.
The Oil We Eat (

related quotations from the discussion that ensued:
"It is in the nature of a limited company that it can have no responsibility either to the environment around it or to the people who work for it. It is no use blaming the directors - if they do anything that might reduce profits for the shareholders they will quickly be replaced. And the shareholders not only have no liability for debts incurred by the company - but they take no responsibility for the world of nature around them. If the directors can secure bigger profits by dumping poisons into the nearest river - they have to do this. If they do not, they will very quickly be replaced. If they can make more profit by halving the work force - they will have to do so or again they will be replaced. If both shareholders and directors suffer from that most uncapitalist thing - a conscience - to the extent that it interferes with profits - that company will be swallowed up by another giant that has no such inconvenient scruples."

"Modern economics, whether informed by Marx or Keynes or Hayek, is premised on the notion that the planet has an infinite capacity to supply us with wealth and absorb our pollution. The cure to all ills is endless growth. Yet endless growth, in a finite world, is impossible. Pull this rug from under the economic theories, and the whole system of thought collapses...

Our economists are exposed by climatologists as utopian fantasists, the leaders of a millenarian cult as mad as, and far more dangerous than, any religious fundamentalism. But their theories govern our lives, so those who insist that physics and biology still apply are ridiculed by a global consensus founded on wishful thinking."

"One day, in a frighteningly overpopulated, polluted and chaotic future, people who currently have their heads up their asses will pull them out and smell the devastation they've caused. Still, many heads will remain firmly lodged because of religion. These folks will only deepen their conviction in their rapture fantasies the worse things get."

"Having just finished the Harper's article, I'm left with an odd feeling about the last paragraph. The long article is packed with many statements of fact. He's an authority. But the finale is about him dropping a cow elk from a wild herd that feeds near his Montana home. An act of violence less violent than eating a tofu burger. But this last sentence talks about how his choice preserves the natural order of things, rather than damaging it, as the selfish choices of so many other people have done. This is the crux, isn't it? What's good for you is bad for the planet; what's good for me is natural. This sage wisdom of his about what effect that single act will have in a super-complex system no one can understand in total smacks of a disingenuous confidence play, or an ironic sense of self-importance."

print at work


the oil companies will blow it up

SolarMission Technologies :: The Project


The Onion | I Support The Occupation Of Iraq, But I Don't Support Our Troops

Tax amnesty for twenty somethings proposed - (United Press International)


Iowa is running out of young people. It's kind of sad. They all want to move away. And everybody knows why. "No taxes" aren't going to make them stay, guys. That whole way of thinking is so... old. They'd pay twice the taxes just to be someplace where people didn't give them shit for whoring around a little. So, SURPRISE! they move. Tough shit, Iowa. Adapt or perish.

I was wiping the snow off my car this morning when a redhead crossed the street to go jump onto a bus and (probably) go to work. I didn't see her except for that red hair (like shampoo commercial hair, it was), but I could tell she was in her twenties. I don't want to give anyone the wrong idea; I'm not looking for love or anything. That base is covered, by a redhead, even, but because I ]like to look at redheads, I knew that if I'd seen her around here before, I would have remembered. It made me happy. So many people want to come here to live, and so many of them attractive young women, it makes me glad to be here.

People like to have sex when they're young. There is often controversy over hot teen sex (people think it's sick and bad until the magic hour of eighteen-year-oldness in much the same way that when you're living in sin, the sin magically vanishes --POOF!-- when marriage occurs), but the desire to reproduce, by life's primary mandate, doesn't go away at the end of the teen years. People want to do it well into their twenties, and I hear, even once they're thirty! OMG! People who want to have sex have to find people to have sex with, and the easiest place to do this is a place where there are lots of people. Especially Minneapolis. Here's why. There are so many people here from all over the place, places like Iowa, like North Dakota, from little towns where the only thing going on after nine PM is the radio station, so many people excited to be here where people want to have sex with them and where if they do it they won't be run over by the gossip train. This is where people move specifically for this purpose, from these other places. And you're trying to tell me about eliminating taxes? That idea is so stupid I had to wipe the snot off its chin. If you eliminate taxes the people who will move there are the nursery class, mid-to-late twentysomethings who want to live in a safe (white) suburb, drive a minivan, and are gearing up for their mid-life crises. Young people don't care about taxes. They'd rather sleep on the floor and eat dust than live someplace that amounts to cultural castration.

If you give young people a district where they can just run wild in some city somewhere, then they'll stay. That's how you do it. Make it fun to be young in your state. Or, I should say, just let it be fun, which life already is, in case you've forgotten, which it's apparent you have. Taxes. Sheesh.

Rupert Holmes dies

He liked pina coladas, and getting caught in the rain. Sniffle.

pledge drive

Travel Coffee Mug - Ceramic

Coffee is better out of ceramic. Seven days a week I get in the car without coffee because I refuse to drink my (second) favorite beverage out of something that takes away from its spendidness. To solve this problem and end senseless suffering, all I have to do is drop twenty-some odd dollars to get this mug, or convince someone to buy it for me. Let's see, how to go about this?

I know a lot of you take advantage of this blog an a regular basis, maybe it's to see what's new in watch school, maybe to see if my repudiation of god will ever end, maybe you just feel sorry for me. Whatever your reasons are, for the entertainment, for the links I spend so much time screening, for the hi-larious comedy I create, I'm sure they are good reasons, and I would like to congratulate you for reading this and not some total shitball blog, from which there are millions to choose. I know you read it. I have a list and you're on it. Click the site meter button over on the right and see for yourself. This is really just a way for you to pay for what you already use! I'm trying to help you here. Not hurt. I know you want to be a part of double flee a, not apart from. Make the call. I think it's really special what you're doing for me.

Ok, I'm begging. Look at me. Please buy me the mug. I need the mug.


Sandvik is a company that makes a kind of metal that I use every day at watchmaking school. It's a steel bar two millimeters across, and it costs four bucks a centimeter. That's good steel. It cuts like butter with the HSS gravers; my problem is now that I'm going too fast. It's actually too easy to cut. Not a complaint you want getting back to the instructor or it's back to old chippy, the occlusion-riddled volcanic artifact passing for steel we were using before. You could be cutting that stuff and hit a piece of quartz the size of your knuckle. The new stuff's made in Sweden, I understand. Really good stuff. I hope we don't run out.

The stem-making is going fine. Today I was pretty much getting to know the material again after five days without touching anything watch-related. Tomorrow I'm going to try to get one done and threaded by two o'clock, when it's off to work. We have short school days Friday, which is nice for my work schedule.

13 Ways to Make a Bible Useful

by Aaron Kendall

1. If inserted at the right angle, it makes one Hell of a doorstop.

2. When stacked on top of the Tora and the Koran, you can reach those hard-to-reach shelves with your favorite porn videos.

3. If shot at the proper velocity, it can easily penetrate and decimate a living target who believes in the wrong arbitrarily-selected deity.

4. If you need to fluff up your college paper with long-winded, four-paged meaningless quotes, look no further than the Bible.

5. Bibles are to hot nuns what cute puppies are to hot chicks in your nearby park.

6. You can correct ministers about Bible passages and make them appear as even bigger fools.

7. You can hide utensils in them which you intend to use in digging your way through your prison wall.

8. If you carve a hole through the center, you can make the ultimate Bible Bong. In fact, many people have claimed to see God with the Bible Bong.

9. It can provide you with at least a dozen excuses as to why you molested your four-year-old little sister. Being born into sin is always the big winner.

10. You can use it to spread the love of God, especially while he's drowning everybody.

11. If you hand Bibles out as Christmas presents to young toy-hungry nephews and nieces, it's a subtle way of letting them know that you hate them.

12. You can become part of the new sexual fad called Bibling, where you shove a Bible inside a woman's private area.

13. It can be used as a mobile toilet, when you have to go really bad. It's already full of shit what's the harm?

That's funny, Aaron, but of course, there are nuggets of wisdom in the bible too. Really! Here are some of my very favorite words to live by!

Virgins = war booty! "Have you allowed all the women to live?" he [Moses] asked them.... "Now ... kill every woman who has slept with a man, but save for yourselves every girl who has never slept with a man."
- Numbers 31:1-18

Rape = marriage! Yay! If a man [meets] a virgin who is not pledged to be married and rapes her ... He must marry the girl ... He can never divorce her as long as he lives.
- Deuteronomy 22:28-29

Kill your kids! God did tempt Abraham, ... And he said, Take now thy son, thine only son Isaac, whom thou lovest ... and offer him there for a burnt offering...
- Genesis 22:1-2

Oh no! I'm puffed up with conceit!
... all who are under the yoke of slavery ... who have believing masters ... must serve all the better since those who benefit by their service are believers and beloved. Teach and urge these duties. If any one teaches otherwise ... he is puffed up with conceit, he knows nothing; he has a morbid craving for controversy..., which produce envy, dissension, slander, base suspicions, and wrangling among men who are depraved in mind...
- I Timothy 6:1-5

Big dicks rule!
There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses.
- Ezekiel 23:20

On Jesus:
Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword. For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother...
- Matthew 10:34-35
The next day..., Jesus was hungry. Seeing in the distance a fig tree in leaf, he went to find out if it had any fruit. When he reached it, he found nothing but leaves, because it was not the season for figs. Then he said to the tree, "May no one ever eat fruit from you again." ... In the morning..., they saw the fig tree withered from the roots. Peter ... said to Jesus, "Rabbi, look! The fig tree ... has withered!"
- Mark 11:12-14, 20-21

not really a redhead

but I appreciate the effort
not safe for work

awesome art project

warning, porn-based street art

funny video

eddie d Videotapes

uhappy tree

Flash Movie @

emotiicon party

Girls, Tammy just said she believes in Jesus!

God hates Korn

Yahoo! News - Korn Guitarist Finds God, Leaves Band

I love how "finding" god makes no actual sense at all, and yet we don't question it, because that would hurt people's goofy little feelers.

via spoonbender


life is hard

Maybe Lindsey Lohan can help ease the pain.
maybe not safe for work (meaning let me know if it is or not in your opinion)

somebody make me this

Beer Butt Chicken

cool wallpaper

free from Hubble

wal-mart games - Attention, Shoppers: Bored College Kids Competing in Aisle 6

this is partially about my school

Rolex, Swatch, Alarmed by Watchmaker Dearth, Spring for Schools U.S.

this gives me the creeps

a lot of music videos

unusual body paint

it's opposite day!

So here are some real hotties!
Not safe for work. That part isn't opposite. There are naked people here.

money talks

when it comes to your rights as a property owner. Will the insanity continue?
Government's Ability To Seize Private Property Challenged

decent HST obit

Fear & Loathing in the Afterlife - Jackson Specific


Sims program useful for epidemiology

Scientific If Smallpox Strikes Portland

the gullotine

Everything you ever wanted to know about it.

stolen from metafilter

Right Wing Front Group Attacks AARP Amazingly the right wingers are going after the American Association of Retired People for being an anti-military, pro-gay liberal front group. Really. Web ads placed on American Spectator mag from USANext have a caption, "The Real AARP Agenda" and a big red checkmark on an American soldier and a green "X" on a picture of two men in tuxedos kissing. The implicit message is that the AARP hates the military and loves gays. Even better, USA Next has hired the media geniuses behind the Swift Boat Veterans to attack the AARP and work for the phase-out of Social Security bia private accounts.

Dr. Gene Scott is dead

Dr. Gene Scott


The Imaginary World

people are afraid of nudity

and that sucks.
Why can't we have pictures of naked people showing in our culture?

I just had to doctor a photograph of an Amazing Rack to put it on here so nobody gets in trouble for looking at my page at work. Censoring out breasts like these is a crime. ANd now that I'm looking at my work, it strikes me there's something monstrous and unhealthy about hiding bodies away. One of the strangest things about our modern world is how we all agree that the rules are too strict but we follow them anyway.

page 3 girls
Not safe for work

Drug Study: "A federal study doesn't indicate why, but says Tennessee had the lowest rate of alcohol and marijuana abuse among the states."
I'm guessing methamphetamine was a different story.

weird: Can This Black Box See Into the Future?

RedNova News - Can This Black Box See Into the Future?

make your own font


road trip

Today JV (not that she isn't lovely, but I think at some point I'd like to start to refer to her as a person and not a state of being) I are going to drive to Green Bay to visit an old friend of mine who is in the hospital. Then we will turn around and come back. It should be a good trip. We're taking him some raspberries.

Ok, I wrote that at about nine thirty this morning, and now it's 11:51 pm and we just got back. Newman's doing pretty well and it is good to see him in one piece. He had his badass laptop in the ambulance with him on the way from Madison (where they did a buttload of intense surgery) back to Green Bay, and there was a CD that they had made for him in Madison, explaining his procedures with state of the art digital photography, so Newman got the EMT to hand it to him and he ripped it. Now he has a copy of his medical record, pretty much, up to the point he left Madison. The stuff they can do with imaging these days is pretty impressive. I have now been on a tour of Newman's body. He is pretty bionic at this point, with metal in some bones and pins and whatnot all over the place. He kicked mine and JV's butt at trivial pursuit and we left. I left him all the books I said earlier I would save one: Heidegger's being and time. It turns out that would be a little heavy considering the occasion.

From the road:
J and I had lunch at Abby's somewhere east of Chippewa falls. They had this cherry cream cheese pie that was excellent. The decor was very patriotic. I don't think it was just because of president's day, either. One waitress, I'm not kidding, was wearing an american flag bib, held on by three pins, each of which was an American flag, and the top of those three pins held on a ribbon like you'd see as a magnet on the back of a car, but smaller, in red, white, and blue. That's walking around with five american flags on. That's crazy. As we were checking out she was standing there rolling silverware, and I told her she'd better not spill anything on her or she'd be commiting an act of treason. This got a giggle from her and the manager, who are obviously experts at polite laughter. The placemat had three writings on it, a flag, and two bald eagles. The three things written were the lyrics to America the beautiful, the lyrics to the national anthem, and the pledge of allegiance. There was a stack of these placemats a foot thick, so I don't think it was just today that this was the theme. Interestingly, under the lyrics to America the beautiful, it said "by Irving Berlin 1918, edited 1938", and under the lyrics to the national anthem it said "by Francis Scott Key, 1814". But by the pledge of allegiance, it didn't say it was by any particular author or anything. It's fine with me if there's not an author attributed to that pledge; you can't attribute "I love my little rooster" to any one person, either, but not listing an editor? That's tantanmount to revisionist history. See, in 1954, Congress, after a campaign by the Knights of Columbus, added the words, 'under God,' to the Pledge. The Pledge was now both a patriotic oath and a public prayer. Before 1954, we were a bunch of godless monkey-men who only had two world wars under our belts. Just think how terrible it would have been if we didn't have it planted in our heads that god and america are inseperable from an early age. Shudder. Anyway, I think it's a sign of bias not to list that as an official edit right there on the patriotic placemat. This bias is like a shadow of an invisible thing. You can't see it, but you see signs of it everywhere you look. It's the America that's taking over from the one I like, the way something else took over Minneapolis. The grittiness disappeared and was replaced by "good clean fun" E-block, which isn't good or fun, and other sprawling mall-like venues. I live in the city because I like being an adult and doing what I want at my own risk. Making the whole world safe for twelve-year old girls by putting a rent-a-cop every five feet ruins the experience of even being in public. Uninteresting. Bleary. Same. I want to blow it up. It would be better as rubble.

Considering what's happened to us on other trips, this one was perfect; we got snowed in the day we were going to Vegas last January, and then the day before Thanksgiving we got snowed into Normal IL, in what was, come to think of it, actually the worst weather I have ever witnessed firsthand.



Stupid Computer Tricks

pool videos (Fast Larry's Web Home)

lots of great photography

50 years Gallery - World Press Photo

Paris Hilton's computer

The contents of:
Somebody got hizacked

A better thing to say about the 195,00 year old skulls:
Oldest known human skulls now pre-date God by some 193,000 years

Religion is dumb. Unless it's the one you believe in; then it's the truth.

Science & Technology at Scientific 15 Answers to Creationist Nonsense

This billboard was too racy for some residents of England.

So they put something on her to cover up.

But then vandals took it off again.

So they had to go back and reapply it.

Why anyone would want to look at a picture of a naked woman beats me. Life is mysterious like that.

icBirmingham - Poster girl is stripped!

Sandra Dee dead

The Ultimate Sandra

the faith-based president don't need no science

ABC News: Panelists Decry Bush Science Policies: "The voice of science is being stifled in the Bush administration, with fewer scientists heard in policy discussions and money for research and advanced training being cut, according to panelists at a national science meeting."

Hunter Thompson commits suicide

News From The Associated Press


A Day In The Life of Miss McDonald

This is the website of a girl who imagines she is the girlfriend of Ronald.
A Day In The Life of Miss McDonald (new pictures every week!)

The first newspaper in Scandinavia (1749) now online
Hans: "today i scanned the first newspaper in Northern Europe and published it on my blog"

Somebody's finally getting with the program at the NYT.
Boing Boing: Intelligent Design's idiotic designer

nature anthem

How to destroy the earth at
Sam's Archive


pass the weed

Jeff Gordon won the Daytona 500 today.
It is thought by some that this is a picture of Jeff Gordon, and not just a bunch of advertisements:

I want to devote some time, when i get it, to exploring "sex is for fags" and the comedy group stella. It strikes me that comedy has many different levels of sophistication, and I don't know when they have been seriously studied. If you do, let me know. I have two cents to throw in about the limit to reactionary comedic devices like sex is for fags, and the more interesting ways in which art can develop in a freer form like stella.

Don't go to a party with laryngitis. I did last night and it wasn't fun straining to force air through my rasp-box. It was fun being among friends, though.

The reason I'm sitting down for this post is I wanted to share some wisdom from the late Mr. Tupac Shakur, rapper and spiritual leader to millions. These are the lyrics to his song Thug Mansion, which was a hit. I don't remember if this was a posthumous hit or not, but either way:
Shit, tired of gettin shot at Tired of gettin chased by the police and arrested Niggaz need a spot where WE can kick it A spot where WE belong, that's just for us Niggaz ain't gotta get all dressed up and be Hollywood Y'knahmean? Where do niggaz go when we die? Ain't no heaven for a thug nigga That's why we go to thug mansion That's the only place where thugs get in free and you gotta be a G ... at thug mansion

Verse One [ 2 Pac ( Tupac ) Lyrics ] A place to spend my quiet nights, time to unwind So much pressure in this life of mine, I cry at times I once contemplated suicide, and woulda tried But when I held that 9, all I could see was my momma's eyes No one knows my struggle, they only see the trouble Not knowin it's hard to carry on when no one loves you Picture me inside the misery of poverty No man alive has ever witnessed struggles I survived Prayin hard for better days, promise to hold on Me and my dawgs ain't have a choice but to roll on We found a family spot to kick it Where we can drink liquor and no one bickers over trick shit A spot where we can smoke in peace, and even though we G's We still visualize places, that we can roll in peace And in my mind's eye I see this place, the players go in fast I got a spot for us all, so we can ball, at thug's mansion

[Chorus: Anthony Hamilton] Ain't no place I'd rather be Children, dead homies and family Sky high, iced out paradise In the skyyyyyyyyyy.. Ain't no place I'd rather be Only place that's right for me Chromed out mansion in paradise In the skyyyyyyyyyy..

Verse Two [ 2 Pac ( Tupac ) Lyrics ] Will I survive all the fights and the darkness? Trouble sparks, they tell me home is where the heart is, dear departed I shed tattooed tears and couldn't sleep good for multiple years, witness peers catch gunshots Nobody cares, seen the politicians ban us They'd rather see us locked in chains, please explain why they can't stand us, is there a way for me to change? Or am I just a victim of things I did to maintain? I need a place to rest my head with the little bit of homeboys that remains, cause all the rest dead Is there a spot for us to roll, if you find it I'll be right behind ya, show me and I'll go How can I be peaceful? I'm comin from the bottom Watch my daddy scream peace while the other man shot him I need a house that's full of love when I need to escape the deadly places slingin drugs, in thug's mansion

[Chorus w/ minor ad lib variations]

Verse Three [ 2 Pac ( Tupac ) Lyrics ] Dear momma don't cry, your baby boy's doin good Tell the homies I'm in heaven and they ain't got hoods Seen a show with Marvin Gaye last night, it had me shook Drippin peppermint Schnapps, with Jackie Wilson, and Sam Cooke Then some lady named Billie Holiday Sang sittin there kickin it with Malcolm, 'til the day came Little LaTasha sho' grown Tell the lady in the liquor that she's forgiven, so come home Maybe in time you'll understand only God can save us When Miles Davis cuttin lose with the band Just think of all the people that you knew in the past that passed on, they in heaven, found peace at last Picture a place that they exist, together There has to be a place better than this, in heaven So right before I sleep, dear God, what I'm askin Remember this face, save me a place, in thug's mansion

[Chorus - repeat 2X (w/ ad libs)]


headline stolen from fark

Religious, historical "experts" hold mock trial to disprove "The Da Vinci Code." The novel is full of outlandish ideas, unlike that book about a talking serpent, a great flood and the parting of the Red Sea

flea circus

global oil production is falling

It's a good thing we don't need oil very much because of all this unspoiled arable topsoil we've got lying around. I mean, otherwie how would we eat? And it's a good thing we don't need oil to move food and products to places like Wal-Mart.

(If you think truckers aren't full of themselves, click here. "Eat today? Thank a trucker." I'd say also to thank global oil production.)

A Theory of Power, Jeff Vail's Critique of Hierarchy & Empire

Mayumi Lake - artist statement

Mayumi Lake : "My artwork deals with the interaction between the real and the imaginary. My images arouse complex emotional responses: excitement, fear, and disgust. Extended viewing of my work reveals illusion and proves that seeing is deceiving."

good non-porn art

Sex is for FAGS! - Boys Abstinence-Only Education Coolness Program

brought to you by the white house office of youth purity

magnetar, not a fake word

Monster star burst detected. 19/02/2005. ABC News Online

stolen from fafblog

Treason: Hurting America's Feelings

Treason: it’s all the rage these days! From treasonous news executives to treasonous former Presidents everybody’s doin it. In fact you may be a traitor and not even know it! “That is silly Fafnir I could never betray America I love it an eat twelve flags a day” says you. Well a lotta traitors start off not even tryin to be traitors, it is just that easy to do! Treason isn't just providin aid an comfort to the enemy. It's providin not-aid an discomfort to America. Treason is hurting America's feelings.

Now you may think "oh well Fafnir America's a big country it can take care a itself" but in fact it is very sensitive. When you say its mom's ugly or criticize its foreign policy or kick sand on its face at the beach it is just as hurt as if you'd sold its state secrets. Like every emotional young superpower America needs love and care from its citizens. We've put together a brief guide to treason so you can understand it a little better.

Q: Which of the following is treason?
1. Not wishing the President a happy birthday even when he is clearly wearing a party hat and a "Kiss The Birthday Boy" shirt
2. Questioning the progress, purpose, or justification of the Iraq war
3. Providing material aid to a hostile enemy of the United States
4. Telling America "Hey America yo mama's so fat by the time she bends over it's Daylight Savings Time."

Answer: All of them are treason but number four is the worst treason of all on account of America is real sensitive about the fatness of its mama.

Q: I'm at a formal dinner party when the President shows up half-naked and stinking of rum. Can I tell him he is inappropriately attired without committing treason?
A: No. By embarassing the Commander-in-Chief you're providing aid and comfort to our enemies such as Osama bin Laden and Al Franken.
Q: What if it's the Vice-President in a muu-muu reeking of ether?
A: No. By embarassing the Vice-President you are a heartbeat away from providing aid and comfort to our enemies.
Q: What about the President Pro Tempore of the Senate? Nobody cares about the stupid ol President Pro Tempore of the Senate.
A: No, that's three heartbeats away from treason which is still dangerously naughty.
Q: The Secretary of Agriculture naked and smeared in monkey dung?
A: No. By embarassing the Secretary of Agriculture you are providing aid and comfort to the enemies of agriculture, like potato blight and Dutch Elm disease. Are you on the side of Dutch Elm disease?
Q: Assistant to the postmaster general wearing a suit of old condoms and whale blubber?
A: Now you're being silly. Where would the assistant to the postmaster general get a hold of whale blubber?

Q: Oh no, I've accidentally committed treason! What do I do!
A: Don't worry there is still time to make up for it! America's very forgiving an there's always another second chance to cheer up your country after you've gotten it down. Here's a few examples:

# Calling America an illegal occupier --> three God Bless Americas, two public denunciations of Ted Kennedy as an Islamist sympathizer
# Voting against tort reform --> four America the Beautifuls, three strident blog posts on Why We Must Win
# Selling nuclear technology to North Korea --> four National Anthems, one delicious chocolate ice cream cake especially for the President
# Leaking a CIA agent's identity to Robert Novak --> one fifteen minute segment plugging White House policy on the Sunday morning talk show of your choice
# Leaking a CIA agent's identity to Robert Novak to get back at her treasonous husband --> Totally not treason! Buy yourself a taco.

Now you're ready to go out there and respect your country's boundaries and feelings! Punishment may otherwise include fines of at least ten thousand dollars, imprisonment of at least five years, and the death penalty.

Our Favorite Fonts of 2004



Mozilla Firefox theme


The company du jour that wants to ruin your life.

Let's say a big company has your social security number and entire consumer history. What could possibly go wrong?

MSNBC - Database giant gives access to fake firms

NASA researchers claim evidence of present life on mars

Exclusive: NASA Researchers Claim Evidence of Present Life on Mars


Bome's Image Resizer -


not funny

So. Much. Steel cutting.

Now that it's too late to change my schedule, it suddenly comes to light that we can stay until five PM today to work on our stems. Irritating. I need the practice. And after the weekend, we have three more consecutive days when school is out. We're all anxious that when we come back the feel of the lathe will have faded. Need a little more information, please. Dammit.

I got the best parking spot in the world this morning. Directly in front of the front door. I love that.


bbc photojournalism awards

BBC NEWS | In pictures: World press photo award 2004

mushroom life

Mushroom Life

cool animation videos

These are very well done.
Bernard (Backkom) animation from B.R.B. Internacional (rg animation studios)

HHG2G, the new movie

They talk it over at MetaFilter

First off, HHG2G is one of the oldest in-jokes on the internet. This was a book that made it cool to be a geek. I have a lot of feelings about this adaptation. As far as I can tell, a lot of people feel like Douglas Adams is their private guy, much in the same way as Bruce Campbell, because he was never successfully exploited. His work was smarter then most, and it could never appeal to most people, which, of course, preserved it.

I don't want them to screw this up, but even if they do it won't be the first time it was done badly. The difference threatens to be, this time, them getting the jokes wrong, which would be much more of a bummer than if they dressed everybody in ridiculous, cheesy Dr. Who outfits with atrocious set design. If you haven't ever exposed yourself to the hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy, one of the funniest books ever written, please do so before the movie people have a chance to ruin your idea of the work.

Bush loves to stroke men's bald heads.

Too strange, yet, so real.
one page

another page

What are people telling themselves about this to justify it as normal?

you-know-who: screw veterans

White House Turns Tables on Former American POWs

"The Bush administration is fighting the former prisoners of war in court, trying to prevent them from collecting nearly $1 billion from Iraq that a federal judge awarded them as compensation for their torture at the hands of Saddam Hussein's regime."

napster hack

marv on record, archive: Burning through Napster's collection, free

Rock Fonts

RockRage: Music Band Fonts


MSNBC - Rovers spot strange shapes on Mars

Awesome chili:
1 can Amy's medium organic chili
1 big onion
3 hunks of garlic
1 link pork chorizo from the wedge

Cook the onion till it's mostly dark brown and black
toss in the chorizo and garlic, cook till chorizo is done.
Add chili, cook till simmer.

A parent's primer to computer slang

Google Maps - asshole in washington dc

Google Maps - asshole in washington dc

humans have been around for 195,000 years

Oldest known humans just got older - Breaking News | Print | New Scientist

click where it says filmpjes, and watch, in flash, finger puppeteering.

Here at Saint paul college, in whose library I now again sit, this time enjoying contraband coffee, it is not uncommon to have to park very far away. It has been fairly estimated that if you get here at eight o'clock and don't get lucky, you will have to walk a quarter of a mile through the full parking lots. In the past, people have had to park in the Sears lot across the highway. I can vouch for the veracity of this statement. This morning, I took Kellogg to John Ireland Blvd. instead of making the quick double-right into the school lot off I-94, and against the odds, I hit the jackpot. I got a spot on the street. When you get a spot on the street, even halfway up the hill to the big-ass cathedral, you're still closer than you would be in the best spot in the lots, which are located, well, here's a map.

You should see a little red dot. That's where the street is where I'm parked. Over to the left, that's the lot. Up beyond the boundary of the map, that's sears. Street parking rocks.

BBC In Pictures: Burglar picks the wrong victim

sequels that never made it past pre-production:
Wrapped Up Like A Douche



the library

In the library, with its banner-monkey-clicking students watching Lindsey Lohan videos and visiting the KDWB website, I imagine it's a wonder they can keep the computers usable at all. I mean it. I have just seen this happening. I was standing behind the girl on the KDWB website, and couldn't help myself from saying aloud "Number one for today's hit music. K. D. W. B." and smiling sarcastically. She then turned around to see what kind of crazy person could possibly disparage the best radio station, like, ever. At one point I probably would have thought about her "hey, here's a girl without a brain, I bet I could sleep with her with very little difficulty" and been right about it, but since I'm engaged, every girl has become the equivalent of my friend's girlfriend. They're just sort of there, and some of them deserve to be mocked. My friends deserve to dat ebetter than them. Now that I have been freed from the awful chains of random lust, I can see these ditzes for what they are and lay it to rest, when I say about this girl and many, many others: What a retard.

For big fun, I need look no further than google's search field and see what people have been looking for from this computer lately. I'll never forget the time I was at work and the google field said "PEDOPHILE SEEKING HELP", when I was hooked and this little pastime began. Here today, at this computer:

"a christian lost in the classroom"
(This is really, really funny to me. I just love it so much that some poor little Christian has his or her beliefs challenged by actual knowledge and the they go crying for help to the big bad internet. Ha.)
"asian women's discount clothing"
"brian wilson (life story)"
"christians and ethics"
"christian arguments"
(Um, yeah. This one they are going to need some help with.)
"Depeche mode lyrics"
("We are homos." Repeat.)
"How to over come masturbation"
(I am not making this up.)
"Impacts of masturbation"
(Less prostate cancer.)
"My thoughts on Iraq"
(Now we're talking.)

I should do this every day.


crazy diarrhea

oh boy

stella does pizza


The really seedy side of Jeff Gannon, white house pegboy. Fascinating.

book review: America Right or Wrong: An Anatomy of American Nationalism by Anatol Lieven




a fish?

knock knock

it's jesus

today in history

February 15 may be the day after Valentine's day (Pay attention. Today you will see all the office girls wearing their "I-got-laid-last-night-for-a-change-boots" from wherever they buy those. The black leather ones that come up to the knee. Speaking of which, here's a naked office lady. NSFW) but it deserves to be recognized, too.

* 399 Philosopher Socrates sentenced to death
* 732 Ho-tse Shen-hui, Zen teacher disputes founder of Northern Ch'an line
* 1145 Bernardo elected Pope Eugene III
* 1313 Peace of Angleur
* 1386 Duke Philip the Stout forms Council of Flanders
* 1539 Emperor Charles receives Cardinal Pole in Toledo
* 1552 Dutch coast hit by heavy storm
* 1563 Russian troops occupy Polotsk Lithuania
* 1637 Ferdinand III succeeds Ferdinand II as Holy Roman Emperor
* 1677 King Charles II reports anti-French covenant with Netherlands
* 1686 Jean Baptiste Lully's opera "Armide," premieres in Paris
* 1689 German Parliament declares war on France
* 1745 Colley Cibbers "Papal Tyranny," premieres in London
* 1763 Austria, Prussia & Saxony sign Peace of Hubertusburg
* 1764 St Louis founded as a French trading post by Pierre Laclade Ligue
* 1768 1st mustard manufactured in America advertised, Philadelphia
* 1775 Angelo Braschi chosen as Pope Pius VI
* 1797 Battle of Cape St Vincent
* 1799 1st US printed ballots authorized, Pennsylvania
* 1804 New Jersey becomes last northern state to abolish slavery
* 1842 1st adhesive postage stamps in US (private delivery company), NYC
* 1845 William Parsons, Earl of Rosse, 1st uses 72" (183 cm) reflector
* 1848 Sarah Roberts barred from white school in Boston
* 1851 Black abolitionists invade Boston courtroom rescueing a fugitive slave
* 1852 Great Ormond St Hospital for Sick Children, London, admits 1st patient
* 1861 Ft Point completed & garrisoned (but has never fired cannon in anger)
* 1862 Grant's major assault on Ft Donelson, Tennessee
* 1864 Fire in Rotterdam Neth damages Museum Boymans
* 1869 Charges of Treason against Jefferson Davis are dropped
* 1870 Ground broken for Northern Pacific Railway near Duluth, Minn
* 1876 Historic Elm at Boston blown down
* 1879 Congress authorizes women lawyers to practice before Supreme Ct
* 1882 1st cargo of frozen meat leaves NZ for Britain, on SS Dunedin
* 1882 SS Dunedin leaves NZ with 1st frozen meat to England
* 1895 23 cm (9") of snow falls on New Orleans
* 1898 USS Maine sinks in Havana harbor, cause unknown-258 sailors die
* 1900 General French relieves Kimberley/Cecil Rhodes
* 1902 Underground railway (U-Bahn)
* 1903 1st Teddy Bear introduced in America, made by Morris & Rose Michtom
* 1905 1st race meet at Oaklawn Park (Hot Springs, Ark)
* 1906 British Labour Party organizes
* 1912 Fram reaches latitude 78° 41' S, farthest south ever by ship
* 1913 1st avant-garde art show in America opens in NYC
* 1916 NY Yankees buy Frank "Home Run" Baker from the Athletics for $37,500
* 1917 SF Public Library (Main Branch at Civic center) dedicated
* 1918 1st WW I US army troop ship torpedoed & sunk by Germany, off Ireland
* 1918 Estonia, Latvia & Lithuania adopt Gregorian calendar
* 1919 American Legion organizes in Paris
* 1921 Arthur Mailey completes 9-121 v England, Australian Test Cricket rec
* 1922 Marconi begins regular broadcasting transmissions from Essex
* 1926 Brooks Atkinson Theater opens at 256 W 47th St NYC
* 1926 Contract air mail service begins in US
* 1929 St Valentine's Day massacre (Chicago)
* 1930 Weona beats Toluca in Illinois Basketball Tournament in 10 overtimes
* 1931 1st Dracula movie released
* 1931 Spring training site of NY Yankees in St Petersburg is renamed Miller Huggins Field in honor of the team's late manager
* 1932 3rd Winter Olympic games close at Lake Placid, NY
* 1932 Aust beat S Africa in cricket by an inn in 5 hrs 53 min playing time
* 1932 George Burns & Gracie Allen debuted as regulars on "Guy Lombardo Show"
* 1932 John Van Druten's "There's Always Juliet," premieres in NYC
* 1932 US bobsled team member Eddie Eagan becomes only athlete to win gold in both Summer & Winter Olympics (1920 boxing gold)
* 1933 Karl Radek praises invincible force of German communist party
* 1933 Pres-elect Franklin Roosevelt survives assassination attempt
* 1933 Social-democratic newspaper "Vorw„rts" banned again in Berlin
* 1936 -60°F (-51°C), Parshall, North Dakota (state record)
* 1936 Hitler announce building of Volkswagens (starting slug-bug game)
* 1936 Sonja Henie, Norway, wins 3rd consecutive Olympic figure skating gold
* 1939 German battleship Bismarck was launched
* 1939 Lillian Hellman's "Little Foxes," premieres in NYC
* 1941 Duke Ellington 1st records "Take the A Train"
* 1942 German U-boat shells at Antillian oil refinery
* 1942 Japanese troops march into Palembang, South Sumatra
* 1942 Singapore surrenders to Japanese
* 1943 Women's camp Tamtui on Ambon (Moluccas) hit by allied air raid
* 1944 891 British bombers attack Berlin
* 1944 Bombing & shooting at Monte Cassino convent Italy, begins
* 1946 Bank of England nationalized
* 1947 "Toplitzky of Notre Dame" closes at Century Theater NYC after 60 perfs
* 1948 Mao Zedong's army occupies Yenan
* 1949 Dmitri Shostakovitch' "Song of the Woods," premieres in Leningrad
* 1950 KENS TV channel 5 in San Antonio, TX (CBS) begins broadcasting
* 1950 WM Inge's "Come Back, Little Sheba," premieres in NYC
* 1950 WSYR (now WSTM) TV channel 3 in Syracuse, NY (NBC) begins broadcasting
* 1950 Walt Disney's "Cinderella" released
* 1954 1st bevatron in operation-Berkeley, California
* 1954 WRDW TV channel 12 in Augusta, GA (CBS) begins broadcasting
* 1955 1st pilot plant to produce man-made diamonds announced
* 1956 Urho Kekkonen appointed president of Finland
* 1956 Pirates & KC A's cancel an exhibition game in Birmingham Alabama, because of local ordinance barring black from playing against white
* 1957 Andrei A Gromyko succeeds Dmitri Shepilov as Soviet foreign minister
* 1958 Ice Dance Championship at Paris won by June Markham/Courtney Jones GRB
* 1958 Ice Pairs Championship at Paris won by Barbara Wagner/Rob Paul of CAN
* 1958 Ladies Figure Skating Championship in Paris won by Carol Heiss of USA
* 1958 Men's Figure Skating Championship in Paris won by David Jenkins USA
* 1958 Sjafroeddin Prawiranegara forms anti-govt of Middle Sumatra
* 1959 Antonio Segni forms Italian govt
* 1959 Louise Suggs wins LPGA St Petersburg Golf Tournament
* 1961 Australia beat WI 2-1 in one of best Test Cricket series ever
* 1961 Entire US figure skating team of 18, dies in Belgian Sabena 707 crash
* 1962 US performs nuclear test at Nevada Test Site
* 1963 1st US female world figure skating champ (Tenley Albright)
* 1963 Ken Lynch records "Misery," 1st Lennon-McCartney song by someone else
* 1964 Beatles' "Meet the Beatles!," album goes #1 & stays #1 for 11 weeks
* 1964 Bill Bradley scores 51 points for Princeton
* 1965 Canada replaces Union Jack flag with Maple Leaf
* 1965 John Lennon passes his driving test
* 1965 Maple Leaf becomes official flag of Canada
* 1966 Kees Verkerk becomes world champion all-round skater
* 1967 1st anti-bootleg recording laws enacted
* 1967 D66 (D'66) wins 7 seats in Dutch 2nd Chamber
* 1967 Longest dream (REM sleep) on record, Bill Carskadon, Chicago (2:23)
* 1968 Anaheim's Les Salvage scores 10, 3-pt baskets in ABA game vs Denver
* 1968 WVUT TV channel 22 in Vincennes, IN (PBS) begins broadcasting
* 1970 Ard Schenk becomes world champion all-round skater
* 1970 Carol Mann wins LPGA Burdine's Golf Invitational
* 1970 Dominican DC-9 crashes into sea at Santo Domingo, kills 102
* 1970 KAMU TV channel 15 in College Station, TX (PBS) begins broadcasting
* 1970 Nationalists disrupt UN session on Congo
* 1971 After 1,200 years Britain abandons 12-shilling system for decimal
* 1972 Bill Torrey becomes 1st Islander General Manager
* 1972 Dimitrios Papadopoulos becomes metropolitan of Imbros/Tenedos
* 1972 Pres Velasco Ibarra of Ecuador deposed for 4th time
* 1973 Friendsville Academy (Tenn) ends 138-game basketball losing streak
* 1973 USSR launches Prognoz 3 to study sun (589/200,300 km)
* 1976 12th Winter Olympic games close at Innsbruck, Austria
* 1976 Joanne Carner wins LPGA Orange Blossom Golf Classic
* 1977 Social-democrats win Danish parliamentary election
* 1978 England all out 64 for 1st loss to NZ in cricket (Boycott capt)
* 1978 Escaped mass murderer Ted Bundy recaptured, Pensacola, Fla
* 1978 Leon Spinks beats Muhammad Ali in 15 for heavyweight boxing title
* 1978 Zaire revises constitution
* 1979 21st Grammy Awards: Just the Way You Are, Taste of Honey wins
* 1979 Paul Shirley (21) of Australia, sucked a lifesaver for 4 hrs 40 mins
* 1979 Temple City Kazoo Orchestra appears on Mike Douglas Show
* 1979 US performs nuclear test at Nevada Test Site
* 1980 Eric Heiden skates Olympic record 500m in 38.03 sec
* 1980 Wayne Gretzy assists on NHL-record-tieing 7 goals
* 1981 Joanne Carner wins LPGA S&H Golf Classic
* 1981 Rocket-powered ice sled attains 399 kph, Lake George, NY
* 1982 Dan Issel (NBA-Nuggets), begins streak of 63 consecutive free throw
* 1982 Ocean Ranger oil-drilling platform lost off Newfoundland, 84 die
* 1984 500,000 Iranian soldiers move into Iraq
* 1985 STS 51-E vehicle moves to launch pad
* 1985 World chess championship match abandoned-Karpov 25, Kasparov 23
* 1986 44,180 largest NBA crowd to date-Phila at Detroit
* 1986 Ferdinand Marcos wins rigged Philippines presidential election
* 1986 Phil Natl Assembly authorizes 6 more years for Ferdinand Marcos
* 1987 ABC-TV begins broadcasting "Amerika" mini-series
* 1987 Karlstad skates world record 10km (14:03,92)
* 1987 Nikolai Guljajev becomes world champion skater
* 1987 Craig Stadler disqualified from Andy Williams Open for kneeling on a towel to make a shot
* 1988 US performs nuclear test at Nevada Test Site
* 1989 Israel attacks border strip Taba near Egypt
* 1989 Soviet military occupation of Afgh nist n ends
* 1990 Baseball owners lock out players
* 1991 Freighter with dynamite explodes in Phang Nga Thailand, 120 die
* 1991 Troy State sets NCAA Div II record with 103 points in 2nd half routing DeVry Institute 187-117
* 1992 100th episode of "Cops" airs on Fox
* 1992 Jeffrey Dahmer found sane & guilty of killing 15 boys
* 1993 Bomb strike on mafia drug lords in Bogot , Colombia; kills 14
* 1993 Bombings by mafia drug lords kill 14 in Bogot Colombia
* 1993 Howard Stern Radio Show premieres in Rochester NY on WNVE 95.1 FM
* 1994 US asks Aristide to adopt a peace plan from Haiti
* 1995 Burundi premier Anatole Kanyenkiko, resigns
* 1995 Dow-Jones closes at record 3986.17
* 1995 Population of People's Republic of China hits 1.2 billion
* 1997 US female Figure Skating championship won by Tara Lipinski
* 1997 US male Figure Skating championship won by Todd Eldridge
* 1998 Dale Eggeling wins Los Angeles Women's Golf Championship
* 1998 Daytona 500 race

yee haw

Here's what I want for a gravatar. I don't know if the words will be visible at 80 by 80 pixels. If not, I'll have to get another one, which is too bad, because that captures the degree of absurdity I'm going for perfectly. This is just on the near side of too much, which is where you need to be. I learned this from watching space ghost coast to coast, stella, and other absurd/sarastic comedy.

-update- gravatar shrinks the images to 30 by 30 on display (cheap), so I may ditch it and haloscan and host comments through blogger so I can get a decent size photo up.


We'll see if
he has a reply to me this time. The last time, he kind of bitched me out for bothering him with my naivete, which you get to do when you're Marvin Minsky. In hindsight, I deserved it.
Dear Marv,
I'm not sure if this is one of the things you'd concern yourself with, but I though of you when I wondered; why do we have favorite things? I felt almost disgusted when I discovered I had picked up the wrong coffee mug this morning, such is my preference for my usual one.

Here's a recent interview, in which he actually talks about a coffee cup. /mp3


What could be more romantic than to take your lady out for dinner on Valentine's day? Making it yourself. Just in case some of you did take your ladies out, I will not rip on it. Even though I kind of want to. I mean, the waiters can be so rude. But anyway, here's what I made:cajun shrimp alfredo

I used only two of the three suggested three tablespoons of blackened whatever, thinking that for cajun, you should use cajun stuff, which was the right move. Also, I skipped the egg yolk. It turned out really well. The cheese I used was called Ridder, and is made in a Norwegian monastery. I was going to go with Asiago, but I have learned that you want to do what the cheese guy says. That's why he's the cheese guy.

lunch break at mefi:

"I wish I could give you that sunset.
I wish I could give you that rainbow.
I wish I could give you that wedding you always wanted.
Here's a Hershey bar.
Have some patience, please.
I'm only one fucking person."
and a lot of other great love poems to celebrate Vday.

What the hell is going on at CNN?
"Two stories posted in the last week on the CNN website, one on nukes in Iran last Wednesday, and another on nukes in North Korea on Saturday, both use the same aerial photograph of the same purported nuclear power plant!
But one is supposed to be in Iran and the other is supposed to be in North Korea!"

Kneel before Zod this valentine's day.

Chaos math is getting its due, Mandelbrot dusts off his traveling suit again.

AAAHHH! Google print!

Bacon, nesting. More. I love this kind of thing.

I, like Elmo, am tickled. Unlike Elmo, I'm not a good idea turned into saccharine worthlessness in a shameless effort to target a younger demographic for commercial exploitation. (Grover would never have sold out.)

I am tickled because a guy in my class, Alvin, sold me my first mechanical watch today. It was a steal (I'm pretty sure) at $50. It's a 35 jewel Trias, from Germany. Something to take apart and put back together later on.

Porno Valentines Cards
Not safe for work

juvenile boot camp

the vilest abortionist is he who attempts to mold a child's character - GB Shaw

roses for your sweetie

a valentine's day gift we can all afford

dumb - Reservist with 11 children headed to Iraq - Feb 12, 2005

Playboy Newsdesk

Discovering one Playmate's role in the history of the Internet - Lena
safe for work


morbid curiosity?

Bundy Confession Tapes Revealed For The First Time
/audio, naturally

near miss

video of motorcycle crash
nsfw banner ads

If you want to be cheered up, look at the picture at the bottom of this page.

the whole story about Gannon

Sorry, I've been too busy reading about it to digest it. Here it is:
Rigorous Intuition: Stirring the White House honey pot

Riveting, and much deeper than the press pool.

missing radioactive material found in Boston

What missing radioactive material, you ask? Oh yeah, they forgot to tell anybody and it's been missing since October. Who are they? Halliburton!

for fuck's sake

The 48 Laws of Power

try this once

before you dismiss it. It's like touchgraph, but with music.

Escher Web Sketch


Hilarious, rock criticism, but of bands' photographs.
Hall of douchebags at Rock And Roll Confidential | Your Band Sucks

a reader writes in re: Godot:
""Waiting . . ." was regarded (at the time I read it, which was about 1970) as the "quintessential existential " play. I later read another short piece of his, and it was in much the same voice and persona. I remember that play as the one from which the phrase about contemplating one's navel was borrowed. That phrase turned up a lot of places for several years after that; "Waiting . . ." is a short play and when you read it you will understand several things. Like why the phrase was borrowed, for one thing.
Beckett said things well, sometimes, and when people find a thing well said they tend to use it until it's downright hackneyed. Trouble is, it was a well-said thing in the first place and all that repeating it kind of messes things up. Sort of like Pachelbel's Greatest Hit, the Canon in D. It's in the elevator now."

Not there yet, but we're a step closer to solving the mystery. Thanks.


I have been moved by Newman's plight and am mailing him some of my very favorite books, even though between the two of us, never has a book been returned. A list:
Candide, Voltaire
1984, Orwell
The salmon of doubt, Adams
Wonderful life, Gould
The selfish gene, Dawkins
Criticism of Russian lit., Nabokov
Life with Jeeves, Wodehouse

Bummy volunteered to throw a few in too:
Magister Ludi, Hesse
The kiss, K. Chopin
On being and time, Heidegger

These mail Monday morning. I want them back at some point.

Installing a Kitchen Faucet

You must be a retard if you can't install a kitchen faucet. It's easy. There are also webistes that walk you through the process, such as this: HomeTips Installing a Kitchen Faucet

There is a "handyman" who "takes care" of things around here "sometimes", named, and sorry, real name this time, Troy Nordberg. When he put my sink faucet in, he did it wrong, and consequently, I had to redo it myself because the copper pipes below were shooting water everywhere. A trip to Menard's on a mild winter's eve isn't a bad thing when you've got the company of someone as lovely as my fiancee, especially when you see a monkey while shopping there (Yes, a guy had a pet monkey. It was awesome.), but the point is it's not a trip one should have to make at all. Not when someone is supposed to be a competent plumber.

He didn't read step 2 of that page, in which the plate that is connected to the faucet gets installed. Good old Troy just put the new one through the old plate and left her swinging in the breeze. All the resistance when turning the faucet on and off would come from the copper piping itself. Copper piping isn't meant to do that, so after a few months of bending, it gave way.

I knew nothing about Troy's laziness until water went all over the place and I had to investigate. When the going gets tough, well that's when Dale switches into "awesome" mode and things happen as if by magic. Replacing the faucet presented no major problems, just a quick job and she was fixed. The magnanimous and comely J played a key part in the process by voluntarily overseeing the project's successful completion. She's a good boss. Firm, but fair.

Be warned if you live in Minneapolis, there is a man who wants to "fix" things for you. He left me without running water for four days while doing the plumbing in this house. His name is Troy Nordberg and he did bad work for me. Now you know.

If your name is Troy Nordberg and you want me to get rid of this post, I can be bought. Gmail me with the details of the lavish forthcoming bribe.



I just got off the phone a little while ago with the illustrious and esteemed Mr. Newman. He has been in a nasty car accident and is currently taking up residence in one of the better hospitals in Wisconsin. Fortunately, they have plenty of hardcore painkillers on hand to help him deal with the excruciating pain accompanying his condition, which I feel it would be gauche to extrapolate upon here.

I'll say this, which the doctors and everybody said, that he's lucky to be alive. This is not an exaggeration, because the human body normally goes into shock when it's in enough pain, and that, coupled with the loss of lots of blood, usually kills people. This, somehow, did not kill Newman. He awoke with people cutting his car open to get at him. After the administration of, in his words, "a motherload of blood", he wound up in a major city's hospital by automobile, the helicopter being impossible to use on account of fog. A lesser man might not have tolerated the pain, but he's not an ordinary guy.

Anyone wishing to make contributions to a package may contact me. Those free boxes from a while back showed up at my house and I feel like mailing him some stuff to read.


How To Start Your Very Own Blog In Fifty-One Easy Steps! ||

you-know-who: "screw the public"

U.S. Scientists Say They Are Told to Alter Findings: "More than 200 Fish and Wildlife researchers cite cases where conclusions were reversed to weaken protections and favor business, a survey finds."

No blondes today.

not safe for work

I usually don't like the photo shoots that have props in them. Ornate outfits, sets, these things take away from the naked goodness. But that's usually, not always.
not safe for work

I got a kick out of this article entitled "wedded bliss".
I mean, how can you not read an article called that? It's like an onion article, but real.
These two honkies don't have a very developed sense about themselves or their relationship. This, coupled with their love of talking about themselves, is what gives the article its distinctive flavor, which I can't figure out if we're supposed to laugh at them for, or learn from.
The Albert Lea Tribune

On a sad note, there is bad news that brings me to browsing the Albert Lea newspaper on a Saturday morning at six AM. A good friend has been in an automobile accident. His name is Newman, and all I know without looking up his parents, is that my ex-girlfriend, who is a friend of his girlfriend's, called last night with the disturbing news that she received a phone call from Newman's distraught girlfriend, who said he was having back surgery. In case anyone hears more, let me know. In the meantime, I'll be looking up his parental units, the only way I know to find him. I understand the distressed girlfriend was less than helpful in nailing down any actual locations.

Last night miss wonderful and I drank wine and read about a third of Samuel Beckett's play Waiting for Godot, which Rania left in my mailbox. We read it aloud. I think there are a total of three characters, and only two main ones, so it's really pretty easy for two people to read. As I was saying yesterday, and this has been going on for months, but there's not a week that goes by without me reading somewhere that phrase, "waiting for godot". I have suspected it's fancy-talk for "an exercise in futility" or "a waste of time", but maybe with an extra emphasis on something, like being miserable in the meantime. No that I'm actually going to understand what the deal is, I'd like to write to someone who wrote that phrase and ask them exactly what it means to them, and see if they actually know, or whether it's just "the thing to write" in east coast intellectual journals and, of course, elsewhere. Now that a little guy like me is talking about it, though, it might be dying down, the way retro shirts became less fashionable after stores like JCPenney got them. In fashions of all stripes, it's apparently not fun if everybody's in on it.

If anyone wants to celebrate the movie that is Platoon, get in touch. Feb 21, barring unforeseen circumstances, I'm drinking Jack Daniels and watching Platoon at a friend's house. So come with! And if you can't make it, register for a drunken phone call from yours truly by sending me an email! Party! It really shouldn't be that bad, but the Jack Daniels thing is happening.

Well, the week at school was grueling. I haven't been telling all about what we're doing regularly for some reason, but we're now making winding stems, which I can't find a picture of right now.They're 20 millimeters long and have nine sections which all have to be in tolerances of +/-0.03 mm, in all dimensions. There's filing, threading that goes on, it's pretty complicated and a lot of work. And I screwed up Thursday's. The assignment was finish five by the end of Tuesday and it ain't gonna happen for Dale. Some people are actually going to be finished, and that's what bothers me. So that's why I'm going to kill everybody. No, they don't deserve to die. They deserve better grades than me. And they will get them.

So have a great weekend! Go outside, pop the cork out of a really good imported Czech beer that's at about fifty degrees, and watch the girls pass by. Unless you're a pretty girl, in which case you should put some nice clothes on, find a guy drinking a really nice Czech beer, and pass by him. Maybe he'll have a spare.



Google Search: waiting for godot

Can someone tell me what "waiting for Godot" means? It's a really fashionable thing to write these days and assume your audience is "in" enough to get your meaning, but I'm not, so let's cut the crap. What the hell is it?

William James Sidis

The first man to formally receive the Mark Hamill Tragedy award.

The New Yorker Article


MIND, n. A mysterious form of matter secreted by the brain. Its chief activity consists in the endeavor to ascertain its own nature, the futility of the attempt being due to the fact that it has nothing but itself to know itself with.

-Ambrose Bierce, Devil's dictionary

Because I care

No one has time to do what they do and read the stuff I point to here. Sometimes I see something that I think of later and if it's good, it goes on the links bar over yonder. --->

Other times these things lie around my brain keeping the corners warm, like this little piece of an article byDavid Foster Wallace on the Maine lobster festival. This is a sub-part of that article, not even in the main body:

As I see it, it probably is really good for the soul to be a tourist, even if it's only once in a while. Not good for the soul in a refreshing or enlivening way, though, but rather in a grim, steely-eyed, let's-look-honestly-at-the-facts-and-find-some-way-to-deal-with-them way. My personal experience has not been that traveling around the country is broadening or relaxing, or that radical changes in place or context have a salutary effect, but rather that intranational tourism is radically constricting, and humbling in the hardest way -- hostile to my fantasy of being a real individual, of living somehow outside and above it all. (Coming up is the part that my companions find especially unhappy and repellent, a sure way to spoil the fun of vacation travel:) To be a mass tourist, for me, is to become a pure late-date American: alien, ignorant, greedy for something you can not ever have, disappointed in a way you can never admit. It is to spoil, by way of sheer ontology, the very unspoiledness you are there to experience. It is to impose yourself on places that in all noneconomic ways would be better, realer, without you. It is, in lines and gridlock and transaction after transaction, to confront a dimension of yourself that is as inescapable as it is painful: As a tourist, you become economically significant but existentially loathsome, an insect on a dead thing.

That somehow cheers me up, in the same way as a good Zippy the pinhead, or a good The cardboard valise. Today at school I wound up breaking my workpiece; I might as well not have gone in. I wish it had happened a little sooner. It's natural for this to occur, I suppose. Tomorrow will be better.

print at school

reason interviews Neal Stephenson

Chinese Watermelon Art

print at school

A Lobbyist's Progress: "Sometime around 1995, Republicans in Washington stopped using the term 'Beltway Bandits.'"

why this blog is better than some

I just calculated I have visited an average of 164.83 websites per day in the last six days.

trade deficit? high.

not good

Meet Jeff Guckert

Oh. My. God.

Jeff Gannon dot com



White House reporter's credentials questioned:
"In a letter to President Bush, Rep. Louise Slaughter, a Democrat, questioned why Guckert routinely received credentials for White House news briefings.

Slaughter linked Guckert's case to recent revelations that two conservative columnists who supported Bush administration policies had received government money.

"It appears that 'Mr. Gannon's' presence in the White House press corps was merely as a tool of propaganda for your administration," Slaughter wrote.

The White House had no comment."

I LOVE it. FRY, Bushies.

The lame-ass "press" catches up on the Gannon story

What a bunch of fools. Get used to them being scooped as long as this administration holds them under its thumb.


More proof that Sean Hannity is a moron: he thinks Gannon is excellent.

Gannon Quits After Blogger Inquiry

After stories like this, broke, sites are reporting the disappearance of a made-up person named "Jeff Gannon":

MediaCitizen: Gannon Quits After Blogger Inquiry

I was looking at the new VANITY FAIR at the barber the other day when something caught my eye.
On the bottom right is Mark Hammill. He does not look happy.

For an idea of what a happy man does look like, refer to George Lucas over there in the upper left with that smokin' twenty-year-old arm candy, pressing her heaving, nubile chest... and so on.

Mark Hammill, I am sorry that star wars ruined your acting career. I am also sorry that it is so obvious to everyone that this happened. As a gesture of sympathy, I'm making you something you deserve if anyone ever did. I'm naming an award after you.

The "Mark Hammill tragedy award":

Boing Boing: Shoplifting is safer than downloading

the penalties for shoplifting a DVD as compared to the penalties for downloading one

BB: "Two Jordanians had a torrid online romance and, after several months, decided to get married. When they met F2F for the first time, they were shocked to discover that they were already husband and wife. According to an Agence France-Press article quoting the official Jordan News Agency, the two were separated from each other but had coincidentally met (again) and fallen in love (again) in a chat room while disguised by their screen names. The rekindled romance ended immediately after they discovered the truth."
Yahoo! News - Budding Jordan cyber love ends in divorce

I love a stampede

Since Ikea is the greatest place in the world, there was a stampede at the opening of one of their new stores in London. After thousands of people arrived in 40 minutes, the store closed. They had been planning to stay open for twenty-four hours.
Because of theirs and others' hunger for bargains, six people wound up in the hospital, five stampede victims and one who was the victim of a stabbing. People abandoned their cars in the middle of a road nearby to walk to the store.

Seattle Post-Intelligencer: AP - Europe

eat carrots

if you don't want cancer.

Bush bribes "allies"

BBC NEWS | Americas | US plans $400m reward for allies


fear and loathing in watchmaking school

This is Joe Juaire, my watchmaking instructor. Joe Juaire is a gregarious, jolly guy. I feel I understand his personality well enough to relate to him in the ways it is important to do so. The rest of my class is, comparatively, a mystery.

A funny thing happened first thing in the morning in class today. I was reading an article that I'd printed up in the library just minutes before and I came to this:
In many traits, men show greater variance than women, and are disproportionately found at both the low and high ends of the distribution. Boys are more likely to be learning disabled or retarded but also more likely to reach the top percentiles in assessments of mathematical ability, even though boys and girls are similar in the bulk of the bell curve. The pattern is readily explained by evolutionary biology. Since a male can have more offspring than a female--but also has a greater chance of being childless (the victims of other males who impregnate the available females)--natural selection favors a slightly more conservative and reliable baby-building process for females and a slightly more ambitious and error-prone process for males. That is because the advantage of an exceptional daughter (who still can have only as many children as a female can bear and nurse in a lifetime) would be canceled out by her unexceptional sisters, whereas an exceptional son who might sire several dozen grandchildren can more than make up for his dull childless brothers. One doesn't have to accept the evolutionary explanation to appreciate how greater male variability could explain, in part, why more men end up with extreme levels of achievement.

It was so novel (to me) a way of looking at the differences between men and women that I made a "Huh!" noise and then started to explain to a couple of people who gathered in to see what this was about. Here I was explaining what everybody (I hope) is already familiar with, that what this was saying was that the deviation for many traits other than sex might be a result of sexual selection, when I made the mistake of saying the words "increased chances of exceptionalism", and one woman just said "That sounds sexist", and turned around, not to speak to me for the rest of the day. For all I know, this will be the last time we ever speak. Anyway, I made the point I started out to make, much to the astonishment of my classmates who thought I was oging to drown in it after being given the slamming door by that lady, which I felt was slightly unfair. After all, I was just exposing people to something that I found interesting and all, not saying that their god is dead or anything. After this, we all turned to our work and it died out. But. Then I saw the very next sentence of the article, out of the corner of my eye.

What are we to make of the breakdown of standards of intellectual discourse in this affair--the statistical innumeracy, the confusion of fairness with sameness, the refusal to glance at the scientific literature? It is not a disease of tenured radicals; comparable lapses can be found among the political right (just look at its treatment of evolution). Instead, we may be seeing the operation of a fascinating bit of human psychology.

The whole thing had actually been about this which had just happened to me as I was reading it. Borges would have been pleased with this synchronicity. The only thing I could not do, and the most just, would have been to point this event out to the class and to that woman --who had performed as if on cue-- her act of "breakdown of standards of intellectual discourse."

I don't know these people, but where this kind of conversation is concerned, I think I'm alone in my class.